Indifferent Hearts

Indifferent Hearts

As they wrapped their presents for the day it had crossed his mind whether this really mattered to him. As the sounds of wrapping paper surrounded them it brought along many different conversations. Mostly the anticipation of their happy faces we’re on each other’s mind. What kind of expression does a person make when they receive a gift? Does it make you happy or does the idea of it do? Theses we’re all the thoughts that had crossed his mind.

“Do you think they’d appreciate everything we’re going to give? I mean it is cold I’d figure they’d want gloves… you know?”  Irma said as she cut along the lines of the wrapping paper. As Ricky taped around the edges and put bows on he muttered, “I don’t know… What’s worst is when they get upset and throw it back at your face, homeless people have a lot pride you know”. They both sat there with worried eyes yet they felt compelled to feel excitement. It was picking up outside with the winter season well into effect. As he looked outside a droplet of rain pierced the windowpane to race to the bottom. Ricky: “Was that the last one? We better get going, I don’t know if they’ll stay out when it’s raining”. Irma: “Yeah let’s go! I wouldn’t want to be out in the rain either”.

They drove around the city for about thirty minutes before seeing anyone resembling a homeless person. “How about that one??” she said.

Ricky: No…yes? I don’t know…they could be homeless or just a regular person having a bad day…”

Irma: Well that makes no sense, we can’t judge someone for being less homeless than another person, just pull over I’ll hand it to them.

He gleams back at her with a fainting smile. She was right, he thought.  We can’t help them by not helping them either and if you do offend someone well then that’s just the way the world works. He turns his signal lights on as they pull over. She scurries to find the nearest supply box, while pulling down the window. “Excuse me! Uh…yes hello, we’d like to give you this gift box just as a gesture of good will, have a merry Christmas!” She can see his cold expression fade away. The gentlemen had a thick green coat the resembled a style long ago. His untamed facial featured gave resemblance to a man in the wilderness. The grey hairs on his chin gave light to his age and with callus hands he held up a sign. It read, “Anything helps, GOD BLESS”. The day was cold but the moment was the warmest he’s had in a long time. “Oh wow…you didn’t have to but thank you, god bless. I get to unwrap something this year. You guys are awesome” He said as he took the package. She smiled tenderly at him. Ricky with a straight face forced a quick smile towards him. As she rolled up the window he geared up towards the next random destination. This went on till the day was done.

“Wasn’t that nice?” She asked him as the last package was dropped off. “Yeah…it was” He responded. “And now you’re a better person for it, you did something good for someone today” she exhaled. “I don’t know about better…but we did do something good today” he said with a sad expression. In the back of his mind he knows nothing had changed. You’re going through the motions…but you’re not connecting to them, he thought as he looked at her with worried eyes. She couldn’t notice his stare as she walked inside the house. He sighs as he looks back towards the car. The rain was coming down now and there was a somber feeling in the air. He shook the idea from his mind. You did something good and that’s good right? He asked himself as she called to him from inside the house. “Yeah…that’s good…that’s good” he whispered as he walked toward the house.

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I’ll have a Blue Christmas….

I’ll have a Blue Christmas….

How come it happens that every Christmas you tend to want to help people? It’s as if all throughout the year and you choose this time to post or talk about something that matters. I wanted to do something this year. I had a talent and I wanted to share it. Every year here at the University we host an annual dinner to all the janitors that work at school. They go unappreciated and I’m sure most of us tend to crack a smile but never more than that as they pass by. It wasn’t enough just to feed them but I decided to get a group together this year and sing them holiday songs to go with their dinners. Sometimes you do things just to help people and at the end of the day there was just three people who actually wanted to help.

One of my most favorite quotes is, “You never need a reason to do the right thing“. I’m not sure where but it always rang true whenever I need reminding. In contrast, there are always people ready to heckle or disbelieve exactly what you’re doing. Maybe through jealousy or in some rude way of calling for help they put you down or give you criticism. I think that’s normal, why? Because people are always ready to prevent you from climbing higher. Whether it is through success or enlightenment there will always be someone in your life ready to hold you back. Birds flock to the same feather after all, so when you change stripes they fear you’ll fly away. Needless to say, we had hecklers, people who didn’t believe we could sing well or just people jealous that they weren’t invited. The first thing I got was from the president, “Wow, I honestly thought you guys were going to suck..but hey you guys sound great!” I was like..”What? Haha See..I’m not sure what that was but it somehow sounded neutral so thanks!”

Maybe it’s just me but in the moment you forget why you’re doing things like this. When you do things for others you forget about yourself. Some things are better left to yourself to hold the rest of your life. There’s no reason to do these things and then post about it on social media. Why? You take away the moment when you humble brag about it. True character is when you do things not for recognition but for the sake of charity. Of course this post has nothing to do with that. Like in a durr voice..”Oh hey..he’s contradicting himself.. hurr.. “come on people I’m just sharing tidbits of my life here.  Why a blue Christmas? I lost some friends recently, I think back to all the people in my life that have been lost and you get the blues naturally. Nostalgia just has this way with words as they say. I got some of the biggest applause from my rendition of Blue Christmas – Glee version (Glee? A TV show mostly for people who enjoy show tunes)  It was most famously sung by Elvis Presley if anyone remembers. This version just gave it a chance to breach the generational gap amongst all of ElvisPresleyBlueChristmasCDALBUM521722us. Although I do enjoy both versions.

Here is a link to the Glee Version: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OyJWDcQ4KgU

Whatever you get from this, just remember there’s always a chance to do good throughout the year and sometimes to get over the blues you got to remember that you’re not alone…there’s always someone to help..and hey..it doesn’t hurt to sing a song. Maybe somehow..someway..they’ll hear it.