Silence

I just walked out. When I had reached the stairs everything that could be said was and this weight was lifted. I stared back at my coffee maker in the corner still steaming from a fresh pot. The brown wooden contemporary tables where my office stood in the middle of the room. I cracked a smile and with a heavy heart I turned the door to face the rest of my day. With each step my heart grew lighter and as I said goodbye to everyone there were promises of meeting up again. Somewhere in the back of my mind and maybe theirs I knew it wasn’t true. I would never see them again. I was all right. They don’t need me anymore and besides, my car is calling me to get home. The thought of a sunny afternoon under the oak tree held my internal regrets. If I had any that is. I don’t why, but I smiled and kept walking, I can’t agree with what they were doing. In my own way I knew I had to do what was best for me. There was an adventure waiting for me that I hadn’t realized yet. Maybe it was intuition that led me to this moment but I felt great. As I breathed my last breath there I was asked what I would do. “I’m going to go get some rest, travel and find my home again”. Like the wind I was free to do as I please, and with that breeze held a silence that was not obstructed with thoughts. Just a simple breath was all I needed. I got a new job, won at the casino, held a new relationship, and traveled the world. I was tired of staring out the window, I almost lived to hate it, all I saw was me doing all those things but I was stuck at my desk. Now I don’t have to wonder.

 

 

 

 

via Daily Prompt: Disobey

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Guts

That feeling you get when you know you’re not wrong. You don’t know how but you know you can make the jump. It’s not your heart speaking irrationally, although it acts that way in the moment. Time slows down,  it’s now or never. You jump, but your feet never leave the ground. You’re imagination goes wild into what could have been. It could of all been worthwhile.

 

 

via Daily Prompt: Visceral

Nervous

 

The nerves. The anticipation. In our wildest dreams we couldn’t imagine that feeling right before performing. It’s both fear and excitement swirling around inside you until you can no longer hold your composure. It’s ecstasy. I tried once, to be self aware of it but in the end it all vanished and I was in the limelight without worrying about the audience. I cared only for that fleeting feeling of complete elation. My hear fluttered, my feet danced, I could only smile from joy and I brought joy to others. I’d do it all again to recite that feeling once again.

 

via Daily Prompt: Recite

In my Mind

To the not so heavenly, I was struck with the idea that I may be abnormal. I was told I was weird by some and a great person by others. This idea festered in my mind until I was suddenly awaken by the thought that to them, they weren’t normal either. Who was I to judge unless I be judged.

This all happened in about 3 minutes at work. While I was thinking, I was also typing away diligently with my work and occasionally stared out the window to birds flying by. The scenery was beautiful that day. You could see the ravens hanging by the tree branches as they quietly swayed back and forth with the wind. I was struck with a sort of admiration for how peaceful it all could be. There was a bit of a dust cloud forming just above the greenhouses. In my mind, I was picturing an even greater scene. I was flying through an eternity of visions and fantasies that my mind had made up on the spot. At first I was this invincible super being and next I was a pirate at sea. To my mind I was everything but what I actually was. I’m an accountant that makes a good living.

The Norm

You wake up in the morning to relive the same day you imagined last night. It’s no longer clear what you’re working for. Your envision of a perfect day would be anything other than showing up to the office at sunrise. You clock in before most people wake up and clock out when people have been off for hours. Is this normal? It’s not so bad, you’re normal as they say to each other. It’s the norm. It’s the part of life no one talks about doing yet we all go through it. From time to time you hear of those that broke out but disregard that as the exception. You tried, it didn’t work out for you. It’s all right to be normal. They can’t see you, but you can see them.

 

via Daily Prompt: Opaque

Silver Lining

Silver Lining

“Splendid. Another day is done and I’m at a loss for words. The leaves were withering off the trees as the November rain came pouring in through the season. I walked slowly through the park with leisure. The sound of squirrels rustling through the leaves gave me a sense of quietness.I cracked a smile, however faint it was. What seemed a gloomy day had a silver lining. I had found the reason behind my void and endless vexation. You go through life always believing the most logical and unequivocal sense of reason can guide you to the right answer. As simple as it may sound it’s not always the direct route that guides you to blissful paradise. It’s the opposite. You get courage from your fears right after you go through it.  Trying to protect yourself you end up hurting those that mean the most. Running from terror gets you hurt and embarrassed. Instead…look into it… to face the monsters lurking within your heart. It may sound wrong but it feels right. Just splendid.”

 

 

via Daily Prompt: Lovingly

Vexation

Vexation

I want them to see what I’m doing….there’s that uneasiness and relentless anger that comes with doubt of not knowing.The kind of stoic anger that makes your blood boil in solitude. Do they see me?? What if they miss all the important things I’m doing? What if at the last minute they just catch me at my worst moments. Would they think that’s how I always am? Ah but to be a fool of my own imagination, now that would be irony in it’s cruelest form.I can’t act like this all the time, I want to be myself. I want to be someone that doesn’t mind not being noticed. To drift peacefully in a blissful melancholy of my own creation. The dream was always there, in all it’s superfluity, courage and ambiguity. I am who I am, indescribable, and yet familiar to those who know this feeling of…anguish.

via Daily Prompt: Yellow